Thursday, August 4, 2011

The Disenfranchised Piglet

Once upon a time, a little pig was born.  His name was Gary.  He was beautifully green, and he had  a perfect set of wings.  In fact, he was the most perfect pig his mother had ever seen.  But the little pig looked around the pigpen, and saw that he was not like the other pigs.

They were pink and roly poly and definitely wingless.  He tried playing with them, but when he started to fly during a heated game of catch, the other piglets called "Foul!"  And when he hid in the grass during and Hide-and-Go-Seek, completely camouflaged by the vegetation, the other pigs were irate, and said he was cheating.

Gary excelled at jump rope, but the other piglets felt that, with wings, he had an unfair advantage, and refused to play jump rope with Gary any more.

Gary was heartbroken.  And so, that night, he spread his wings (literally), left the barnyard, and went to find his way in the world.  He traveled far and wide, and saw many pigs.  In Vietnam, he met a pot-bellied pig named Tran.

Tran was in training for the Vietnamese Pot-Bellied Pig sumo competition, and taught Gary the fundamentals: how to push and how to knock down.  Gary and Tran had a lot of fun practicing.  They became good friends, and shared many a bowl of Pho.  But finally it was time for Gary to take to the skies, and find more of his porcine family.

In Central Europe he met Gregor.  Gregor was a Mangalitsa pig.  His relatives were wild boars.

At night, Gregor and Gary would go out together and hang out at other Mangalisita pig  troughs, telling pig jokes and tossing back buckets of slop.  They all took Gary in like he was family, and especially liked the fact that Gary could act as look-out, saving them from embarrassing curfew violations.

Next, Gary flew to Africa, for he heard there were some unusual pigs there.  He hope and hoped that he would find pigs like himself.  And while they weren't green or winged, the warthogs were a friendly bunch and welcomed Gary with open tusks.  One, named Ashon, was the 7th born warthog in his family, and had much to share with Gary.

Ashon tried to teach Gary to dig with his tusks, but Gary was rather tusk-less.  He tried to teach them Ashon fly, but Ashon and the warthogs were rather wing-less.  Still, they had a good time, sang many verses of "Hakuna matata", and enjoyed doing windsprints with their new green friend.  They even served Gary a fine farewell dinner of yams when he decided he needed to continue his quest.

Gary left Africa.  He flew and flew, always on the lookout for pigs like him.  Finally he spotted a sparkly corner of the world.  There were shiny things there ~ things that shimmered in the sunlight.

Gary came in for a landing.  When he read the signs, he realized he had arrived in the Land of BrightandShinyThings.

He sat down and looked around.  Soon he realized that there were other creatures looking out at him.  Quietly they tiptoed out from behind rocks and shrubs, to get a better look at Gary.

They were Flying Pigs!  Flying pigs of every color and description!  They were everywhere, hovering and fluttering and landing and zooming and varooming around.  They were all as thrilled to see Gary as Gary was to see them.

They played and flew and did loop-de-loops and ate at a sparkly trough.  At night they slept together beneath twinkling stars.  And in the morning, they spread their wings and all followed Gary home to meet his mother, because she had missed Gary very much.

The other pigs were pretty happy to see Gary again, too.  Hide-and-Go-Seek was too easy without him, and no one could jump rope like Gary.

When they are not in the Land of BrightandShinyThings, or with Gary's mother, Gary and his friends can be found both on eBay and on etsy.


  1. Oh I love these little guys, especially some of the new brown, black and turquoise! Many to add to the collection, and great gifts for friends. Thanks!