by Kenn Nesbitt
Poor Santa got stuck in our chimney. I know it sounds weird, but it's true. His feet made it down, but his belly was one size too large for the flue.
His reindeer are up on our rooftop. His sleigh is still loaded with toys. And Santa, that kindly old fellow, is making a whole lot of noise.
We called the police and the sheriff. They showed up with ladders and cranes. They brought all their winches and pulleys, plus bungee cords, cables and chains.
They're working right now to remove him by hoisting him slowly back out. It might take all morning, for Santa is more than a little bit stout.
If you don't have presents this morning, we're sorry you're having to wait. But Santa's still stuck in our chimney. He may be a day or two late.
Until then, please hide all your cookies. Though Santa may find this severe, at least then he'll fit down the chimney when he comes on Christmas next year.