When Frankenstein Was Just a Kid

by Kenn Nesbitt

When Frankenstein was just a kid,
he ate his greens. It's true. He did!
He ate his spinach, salads, peas,
asparagus, and foods like these,
and with each leaf and lima bean
his skin became a bit more green. 

On chives and chard he loved to chew,
and Brussels sprouts and peppers too,
until he ate that fateful bean
that turned his skin completely green.
He turned all green, and stayed that way,
and now he frightens folks away. 

Poor Frankenstein, his tale is sad,
but things need not have been so bad.
It's fair to say, if only he
had eaten much less celery,
avoided cabbage, ate no kale,
why, then, we'd have a different tale. 

So, mom and dad, I'm here to say
please take these vegetables away
or my fate could be just as grim.
Yes, I could end up green like him.
So, mom and dad, before we dine,
please give a thought to Frankenstein.

A bracelet appropriate for wearing while all things green can be found here.

Black Cat St. Patrick's Day Bash

Be Sure to Wear Some Flowers in Your Fur

In a former life, this kitty was a flower child. She, no doubt, roamed the Haight Ashbury handing out daisies to passersby and singing songs of peace and love. Her hair was long and flowing, and she always wove flowers in it. She wore dresses made from India bedspreads that smelled like sandalwood incense. If there was a love-in at Golden Gate Park, you could ount on her to be there. And she had a name like Sunshine.

In this life, she has been reincarnated as a cat. A lampwork glass cat, also named Sunshine.



Now she has flowers on her tummy and on her hips.



Instead of the songs she sang, she purrs a happy peace-and-love purr.



And yes, she's still up for a Love-In. Rescue her from my ebay store and take her there!

A Tail of Three Kitties

In Dickens' "A Tale of Two Cities," handsome hero and former aristocrat Charles Darnay becomes a victim of the French Revolution's wrath despite the fact that he's a good guy, and Sydney Carton, a sleazy British lawyer, tries to redeem himself for his past sleaziness by ultimately substituting himself for Darnay on the guillotine. Oh yes. Darnay's wife, Lucie Manette, is the daughter of a doctor who spent 18 years in the Bastille, lost his mind, and made shoes.

This set - a choker necklace and matching earrings - features three lampwork glass kitties: Charles, Lucie, and Sydney. Though it might appear they are guillotine victims.



They are, in fact, members of the charm world, who can exist with only heads. Each is the guardian of a large Chinese crystal.



In the Charm Revolution, Mewie Catoinette was said to have uttered the phrase, "Let them use Chinese crystals," when the poor charms could not afford Swarovski crystals.



These three kitties were brave soldiers in the Charm Revolution. Lucie spelled out secret messages in catnip. Charles fed the revolutionaries tuna. And Sydney slept in the shoes that Dr. Manette made.




They're all really very nice, and now attempt to lead sedate lives with frequent naps and time spent with grandkittens. While currently in my ebay store, they would prefer life decorating someone who knows all the words to "La Marseillaise," or at least a few. (Hint: Allons enfants de la patrie, Le jour de gloire est arrivé OR Arise children of the fatherland, The day of glory has arrived).



Marchons!

Garden Party for Ghouls

(sung to the tune of "Garden Party")




I went to a garden party to reminisce with all the ghouls
Hadn’t seen a bunch of them since April Fool’s.
When I got to the garden party, they all hollered “Boo!”
Swilling ectoplasm, in the ghosts all flew.

{Refrain}
And it's all right now. Time to haunt some homes.
Spook out all the attics and the catacombs.




Bats came from the belfries. Ghosts came from the tombs.
Witches came from covens, filling up the rooms.
Dracula woke from his nap. Said he had a thirst,
But the bats were at the bowl, quenching their thirst first.

{Refrain}
And it's all right now. Time to haunt some homes.
Spook out all the attics and the catacombs.




Spiders spun their wispy nets. Owlvis hooted loud.
Skeletons were dancing all throughout the crowd.
“I Aint’t Got No Body” was their sad refrain.
Grab some bones and make your own; time for Ghoul Soul Train.

{Refrain}
And it's all right now. Time to haunt some homes.
Spook out all the attics and the catacombs.





Someone opened up a crypt. Out stepped Bert the Bat,
Drinking Type O cocktails, boozing with the cat.
Spiders danced the eight step. Pumpkins rolled around.
Witches limbo-ed ‘neath their brooms. Pumpkins smashed the ground.

{Refrain}
And it's all right now. Time to haunt some homes.
Spook out all the attics and the catacombs.




In my ebay store.

Owlvis Makes His Debut

I just put together a slide show with my newest offerings. Take a peek while I ponder amusing tales for you.