Thursday, January 7, 2010

Money for Nothing and the Chicks for Free?

The other day  I swung by the supermarket in beautiful downtown Burbank before I went to teach.  I needed a few items and I can always count on this particular Von’s to be non-intrusive.  The parking lot’s not awful.  The customers keep to themselves.  The staff is helpful if inept.  First thing I see going in the door is this punked out chick with bright blue hair. 

It was this color blue.

While this is a common sight in, say, my neighborhood, or just about every other neighborhood in Los Angeles, it is not so common in Burbank.

She would have looked good in one of my bracelets.  Maybe this one.

 So I steer around her and head up the aisle.

And there comes a little old lady – had to be 80 if she was a day – and her hair was all poofed up like she’d just had the set and style and it’s bright orange.  Not Lucille Ball orange.  Orange. 

This orange.

My flamingo bracelet would have been a nice accessory.

I move on and next I encounter a little old man pushing his dog in the child seat of his shopping cart.  The man’s 70-something, wearing a  fishing hat, sans lures. 

The dog is sitting on a little blanket wearing a little collar and it pretty much fits right there. 

(This is not the actual dog in question, but a stand in for a cute small dog who would fit in the child seat of a shopping cart.)

I’m thinking... HUNH?!  Isn’t that a violation of the health code?  And why on earth is he pushing his dog around the supermarket?!

But life gets even better.  Because the three of them converge at the end of an aisle.  At which point Blue Hair and Orange Hair start to shriek and bill and coo about the dog.  Isn’t he darling?  Isn’t he the cutest thing?  Oh look how adorable!

And at least then I understood why Fishing Hat was pushing his dog through the supermarket.  To pick up chicks with brightly colored hair.

That was my lesson for the day.  Or, as a friend used to say, "Count the day lost if you don't learn something."

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