The Tortoise and the Slacker Easter Bunny

Once upon a time there was a slacker Easter Bunny who was always bragging about how he was faster than anyone.  (He claims that was how he delivered all the eggs while in truth, his wife did all the work.)  

And he was always teasing the tortoise for being so slow.

One day the tortoise, with a few drinks under his shell, had had enough.  "You think you're so fast," he said, "But I bet I could beat you."

This gave the Easter Bunny a good laugh.

"You?  Beat me?  Like that's gonna happen," the Easter Bunny said.  

This annoyed the tortoise even more.

The Easter Bunny continued.  "I could beat you with one paw tied behind my back."

The tortoise was steaming by now and (rather foolishly) accepted the challenge.  A course was mapped out, and the next day at dawn, the tortoise and the Easter Bunny were ready at the starting line.

The Easter Bunny was yawning as the now-sober tortoise started his slow trek along the track.  And quite honestly, the Easter Bunny was pretty sleepy, and decided to take a little nap before starting.

“Take your time!” he yelled at the tortoise. “I’ll catch some Zs and catch up with you before you hit the first marker."

Then he closed his eyes and went to sleep.  He slept and slept.

Finally he awoke with a start.  He looked around, fully expecting to see the tortoise plodding along nearby... and he was.

So the Easter Bunny decided to have some breakfast,  and went to find a nearby breakfast burrito.  The breakfast burrito, however, made the Easter Bunny sleepy again.  So, with a quick glance at the tortoise, the Easter Bunny settled in for a snooze, chuckling about how he'd leave the tortoise in the dust.  Soon he was snoring happily.

The sun started to sink slowly in the sky and the tortoise, who had been trucking all day, was within a foot of the finish line.  At that moment, the Easter Bunny awoke with a start.  He could see the tortoise far off in the distance.  

He leapt to his feet and started running as fast as he could, gasping and wheezing.  Just a little further and he’d be the first to cross the finish line.

But it was too late.  The tortoise had reached the finish line.

The Easter Bunny, tired and disgraced, collapsed by the tortoise, who was smiling silently.

"Bummer!" said the tortoise.  

“Slowly does it every time!”

ebay charms

etsy charms

Turtle the Storyteller

a Micmac Legend

Long ago, Turtle was the great story teller, and he told his tales to all the birds and animals of the Kluskap's land. On warm summer evenings, friends would gather and listen to his tales. 

During the day, they all avoided Turtle, for once they started listening to his stories, they would not want to leave, and no work would be done.

When the cold winter months arrived in the Northland,  many of the birds flew to sunnier climes, and many of the animals hibernated, climbing into burrows and caves to protect themselves from the frosty air.  But Turtle had no cave where he could spend the winter. 

In the cold, poor Turtle walked more and more slowly.  Winter winds buffeted his shell.  Snows fell.  Turtle nearly froze.  He was cold and lonely.

Finally summer came again.  Turtle spoke to the geese, and asked them to take him south when winter arrived again.  The geese like Turtle very much, and they loved his stories.  But the geese liked to honk as they traveled south, which is how they told their own stories.  If they took Turtle, they would never be able to speak.

Finally they agreed to take Turtle, on one condition: he was not allowed to speak.  Turtle quickly agreed.  What choice did he have?  But the geese knew Turtle's weakness.  He would quickly forget his promise.  And so a plan was devised.

Turtle was to carry a stick in his mouth, and the geese would carry  him by the stick.  Once he was in the air, he wouldn't't dare open his mouth.

Turtle did not enjoy his trip, nor did he enjoy his stay in the Land of the Summer. It was too hot for him in his heavy shell, and he found no animals who wished to hear his stories.  But while he was there, he listened and learned, and soon had many new stories.

When the geese brought him back to the Kluskap's land, Turtle told his stories again.  And he listened to new stories of the animals who hibernated, so that, when winter came again, he could stay and warm digging deep under the soil, honing his stories and waiting patiently for spring. 

Turtle can be found here.

The 12 Great Paths of the Moon

a tale from the Pueblo Indians

A long time ago, when Father Sky took Mother Earth in his arms and mated with her, the Moon was born.  Out in its basket of stars, it grew bigger and bigger.  And, as it grew bigger, the Sun Dogs took turns biting it.

Snap, snap, they went, until the moon was shaped like a crescent.  But the ragged little crescent Moon continued to shine brightly in the sky.

Spirit Walker, who guided all the Two-Legged and Four-Legged Creatures, worried about the Moon, and so she told all the creatures to dance around the plaza: men with Deer, women with Corn, children with Turtles.

On the Night When Red Leaves Fell, the creatures looked up and saw that the Moon was growing bigger! It grew and grew until it had a full, happy face.

But the Sun Dogs chewed on it again, and whittled it down until it was just a crescent shape again.

And so the Two-Legged and the Four-Legged Creatures got used to the growing and the dying of the Moon.  They became accustomed to the Sun Dogs chewing on it, and they grew accustomed to Father Sun casting a black shadow on the moon's round face every so often.

 
All the creatures got together and decided to give each of these moons a name, which are today, as they were then:

# January, Man Moon: Soenpana
# February, Wind Big Moon: Walapana
# March, Ash Moon: Naxopana
# April, Planting Moon: Kapana
# May, Corn Plating Moon: Iakapana
# June, Corn Tassel Coming Out Moon: Kapnakoyapana
# July, Sun House Moon: Tultopana
# August, Lake Moon: Paw'epana
# September, Corn Ripe Moon: Iakowapana
# October, Leaves Falling Moon: Olulpana
# November, Corn Depositing Moon: Iatayaepana
# December, Night Fire Moon: Nuupapana

This, perhaps, is one of the turtles who danced to save the Moon.

For more on the Dancing Moons, look here.

For the turtle, look here.

The Fertile Turtle

The Turtle 




by Ogden Nash   




The turtle lives 'twixt plated decks
Which practically conceal its sex.
I think it clever of the turtle
In such a fix to be so fertile.



Plenty of turtles right here.